Beyond Elsewhere

It’s almost 10:30 at night on Monday. I am having trouble sleeping lately, a lot of anxiety. There’s a lot going on with people around me and in my life and as I tend to really feel other people’s grief and anxiety when I am close to them it doesn’t help when I have my own anxiety. Massive panic attacks over the weekend. Lots of fun.

In other news – I have been confirmed for Lasik eye surgery at the end of this month! There are only 2 weeks left until I get some ativan. Er.. I mean, until I no longer need my glasses!

Also..um.. I completely forgot what my also was!

Oh, yes! So after a month back at curves full time (well, two times a week, plus 3 time the last week in January) I have actually lost an inch on my thighs and a half inch almost everywhere else, except for a couple of 1/4 inches (arm and er.. something else?). I went down a whopping 0.5 pounds BUT 0.3% in body fat, which is pretty sweet. This is all with having NO activity or gym visits last week for an entire week and eating like crap while I was sick. I am happy with the results, I mean I am not happy with the weight number since it went up since May as I wasn’t able to DO anything when the pain got so bad, but I know me. As long as I am active I will drop in size and that’s really all I want. These pills are working and I hope my doctor keeps me on them when I go for my 3 month follow-up next week.

It’s not a lot. I know that… but I’d say losing an inch on my thighs in 4 weeks is something. I’m happy with it! I went today and will go Wednesday or Thursday this week (maybe both!). I have to get back on the Wii Fit, but I have been so tired after work since getting sick last week. To be honest, I’m terrified about what it’ll say to me with over a week since my last Body Test. heh

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Is it sad that I feel like I need an excuse to give my Wii Fit for not using it so far this week? I feel like I should hit up my local CLSC and get a note so that it won’t judge me as harshly as it has been because it’ll be a few days since I have used it.

Dear Wii Fit,

Please excuse Cat from her daily workouts as she has one hell of a cold which has resulted in fever and now respiratory problems. She is not allowed to flail around on your balance board until further notice.

Signed,

A Doctor-type Person

The stupid Wii Fit judges you! It’s horrible! All I want to do is play Rhythm Kung-Fu over and over and yet the Fit feels the need to mock me and my overweight, unbalancedness every time I turn it on! Hmmph.

But none of that is going to happen right now. Monday I left work at noon with a fever and feeling like gravity was just pushing down on me with all its might. This morning I woke up, fever-free but I still felt really weary and then it got difficult to breathe. It feels like my left lung isn’t taking in any air. It is a very uncomfortable feeling. For part of the day I had this weird seal-bark sounding cough, which seems to be less seal-barky now and more dry. But I can’t really talk much without starting to hack. If I still have this pressure on my chest in the morning I guess I will actually drag myself to the CLSC and wait in a waiting room for hours only to be told I have a cold and to go back to work and have some soup or something. I don’t think they’ll give me a note to quell the wrath of my Wii.

Actually, it seems that whenever Shawn and I go look at historical things we get sick. It happened in 2006 when we went to visit Upper Canada Village and we both ended up with The Plague of Yore. And now? We went to see old paintings at the museum on Sunday and I have some sort of respiratory/hacking thing. Since Shawn mentioned he was starting to feel the gravity push thing this morning I wouldn’t be surprised if we both ended up with whatever the heck this is.

In other news… at 4:50pm this afternoon the sky was just so pretty I stepped out the front door on to the porch to try and snap some shots.

If I hadn’t been in my pyjamas I would have wandered out into the street to get a better photo of the sky over the houses. But alas, I was in my jammies and was feeling like crap with messy hair, too! So I did what I could from my balcony.

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This has really been an action packed weekend!

Last night we went over to my inlaws’ for a belated birthday dinner as I ran out of free time on my actual birthday weekend. They made turkey and all the trimmings, I guess since we didn’t have it at Christmas? Either way it was delicious. And then the big surprise! A birthday cupcake tree!

I was so excited! The cupcakes were vanilla with colour sprinkles in them. Yum! I am a sucker for bright colours – which you can’t really see here since Shawn’s iPhone doesn’t have a flash and I didn’t bring my own camera. And never mind the wall in the background. My father-in-law has a project going on which seems to involve the taking down of the wood panelling that was there, painting, putting up raised panel and cutting a hole through the wall to the outside. Yep. My FiL is AMBITIOUS!

Today, Sunday, Shawn and I headed out for a lunch and museum adventure. We went to the Montreal Museum of Fine Arts to see the Waterhouse exhibition. (Since the exhibit ends on February 6th, I don’t know how long that link will work!). The museum was so crowded with stupid pushy people that it made for poor viewing of the paintings. I was rather disappointed by that. I had thought that before noon most people would be at church or having brunch. Guess not. I did score some cool things from the shop on the way out. My favourite of which is this leather bound, empty book with dried flower petals inside of it. I just adore it. What I’m going to put in it I haven’t a clue right now, and where it’ll go? Beats me. But I don’t care. I love it.

Look how beautiful that book is!

I bought postcards of my favourite paintings in the exhibit. They had them on these neat little class easel things too, but those were $16.95 EACH! So I spent my $1.50 and $2.00 on these post cards and will try and find some easel frames at the dollar or craft store.

After this we went to Hurley’s Irish Pub for some pub grub for lunch. I had a great Beef Guinness Stew and Shawn had this delicious St Ambrose chicken thing. We drove home, by way of Zellers to pick up dog food and I was suddenly feeling very off. My nose and eyes were watering like crazy and my neck was stiff, so at 4PM I went to take a nap.

Now I’m about to watch Legend of the Seeker and then try and get in a half hour of Wit Fit Kung-Fu because I love it so much!

Hope you all had a great weekend, too!!

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This week was brutal. Work was really busy, I ended up going to Curves 3 days this week, got my WiiFit in and did two nights of working out that way (about an hour each time), plus 40 minutes this morning! I also went to my very first Opera at work (school).

Both my body and my mind feel quite exercised this week. My thighs in particular from all sorts of lunges and wall chairs (aka air chair). I feel good about things. Better than I have in a long time.

Sure, I don’t particularly care for opera, and having seen this production sort of confirmed that (although I do love watching live performances. I just don’t like female soloists.) but I loved watching students that I know perform and seeing why scholarship recipients are worthy of their scholarship (one guy in particular was just fantastic!).

I would have gone to Curves more than 3 times this week but one day I was in desperate need to find pants that weren’t torn, which mine were. I didn’t have any luck but at least I got out at lunch.

The one frustrating thing I discovered this morning while paying bills is that Curves seems to have made a huge mistake and are debiting my credit card TWICE A MONTH! Argh! No wonder my spending has gone up more than I thought. I didn’t catch it in December because I had a bunch of online gifts on the statement, but I caught it with this new bill. I will be going there on Monday (maybe to work out, maybe not) and asking them to reimburse me the 2 extra charges or stop my billing 2 months earlier (personally, I’d like the money back to bring my balance down). I need to make sure this gets fixed before the end of next week because I’m supposed to be billed the 3rd of each month so I’d like only ONE charge to go through in February.

Monday I am going to my very first Highland Dance class. I am nervous, but my friends teach it and another friend goes while her kids are being taught as well. So I thought for $8 why  not check it out? Now that I am in NO pain from these wonder drugs my Rheumatologist gave me in November I am feeling the need to be much more active. Mondays are also my piano day, so when I have piano I won’t go. If I like it I’ll go on non-piano days.

I do have great feelings about 2010, I just hope they last!

One thing about all this activity and work stuff is that I am online a lot less when I am home. I think that’s a good thing for me because I need to spend less time puttering away on the computer and interact with life in a face-to-face sort of way. I really want this year to be my Year of Doing Things. I am going to make a very good effort to not party poop too much.

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Well, I’m 34 now. It’s a weird number. I’m out of the “early 30s” and into the “mid 30s”. Something about that bothers me for some reason. I feel like I am losing my youth and the right to be cute. I know that sounds odd and I can’t think of a better way to phrase it. Although people seem to be younger these days than they were say when my parents were my age. Does that make sense? Am I too old for my punky coloured hair and various piercings? I don’t think so, but I feel like mid 30s should be more adult or something. I did mention this before on my blog but I feel like people are actually a decade behind where they really are. 30 is the new 20. 40 is the new 30. Etc. And as long as I feel young then I guess it’s a matter of how a person feels, then? Yes?

I don’ t know. What I DO know is that for the first time in the past 2 years I have actually felt renewed this January. It has nothing to do with birthdays, but the year I think. Last year was miserable for so many people and 2008 wasn’t all that peachy either. But this year? This year I feel like there’s promise. Of what? I don’t know. But I have this enthusiastic energy about me and around me that I think that’s a good thing.

Considering that on my birthday last year I was here:

This year was pretty awesome. Not to mention mild (for January). I even had sidewalks showing!

I spent my birthday festivities with family and terrific friends and have never felt more loved. I have a bunch of photos but I just don’t have the energy to edit them all right now. If you’re on facebook I have uploaded a bunch already. I don’t have to resize those ones.

Thanks to everyone in my life, either close by or far away. I appreciate and love each and every one of you!

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